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Do a Google search on how to get your best body and you’ll be inundated with pages of training tips. For those who want to take that same, proactive approach to creating your best relationship, I have your “exercise regimen” below. 1. Do the things you did the first year you were dating. As the months and years roll on, we tend to slink into our proverbial sweatpants and get lazy in our relationship. We lose our patience, gentleness, thoughtfulness, understanding and the general effort we once made toward our mate. Think back to the first year of your relationship and write down all the things you used to do for your partner. Now start doing them again. 2. Ask for what you want. Over time, we assume that our partner knows us so well that we don’t need to ask for what we want. What happens when we make this assumption? Expectations are set and just as quickly, they get deflated. Those unmet expectations can leave us questioning the viability of our partnership...

If dreams are the royal road to the unconscious, as Freud claimed, then that route may be a highway full of tortuous twists and turns—leading nowhere. But it affords some spectacular vistas along the way. By turns, dreams have been deemed prophecies of the future, full of meaning—if only someone could figure out what it is—or the effluence of nerve cells randomly unwinding from a busy day. Once considered a hallmark of the periodic surges of brain activity known as rapid-eye-movement sleep, dreaming now seems somewhat less bundled up; at least 25 percent of dreams are scattered through other parts of the night. Dreaming has been seen as critical for learning, or at least important for solving problems—or as nice but unnecessary. It’s an emblem of mental illness—or a safety shield deflecting it. The newest switchback on dreams comes from South African neuroscientist Mark Solms. Maybe, says Solms, we’ve been confusing cause and effect. Dreams, h...

Everybody needs a guardian angel to help them through tough times and to let them know that someone cares. Like in the song Your Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, you don't have to have wings and a halo to be someone's guardian angel. You just need to love and care for another person, even for a person you don't really know. Step 1 First of all, you may want to remember what a guardian angel is. Simply put, it's about being someone who watches out for another person and helps them regardless of what's in it for you. It's about caring for another person because that person matters and because they need help. There are also spiritual and mystical interpretations of guardian angels but this article is focused on the practical exercise of adopting the role of someone who is prepared to watch over another person and make sure that things go right for them. If you're into music or movies, listen to the song Your Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Ap...

There is a saying that talent is something you’re born with but skill is something you learn. This means that skill is something anybody can learn despite their age, color, race, nationality or gender. I called it a skill and not a job because you can actually become your own boss if you know your craft very well. In the past decades, professions like law, medicine and engineering were big deals. Every father wanted their sons/daughters to become a lawyer, doctor, engineer or banker. But today the game has changed. The internet has changed the where, when, how and perhaps why people do things. The jobs that didn’t exist 10 or 20 years ago now exist because of the internet. For a savvy entrepreneur, the internet is a goldmine. It gives massive leverage to anybody who is serious about the internet business. The internet is so wide and vast that it can comfortably accommodate everybody’s goods and services. There are many people who still do not have a clue about how t...

You’ve researched the company, updated your CV and even stalked the CEO on Facebook – and now you just have to make it through the interview. Increasingly, in order to scout out the top talent, businesses are now throwing curveball questions during the interview process. Asking about seemingly unrelated topics can help give a company a wider snapshot into the person and their life. Recruiters and top career experts to reveal the interview questions every candidate should know the answer to by heart – and how to handle them if one is thrown your way. What are you proud to have accomplished at your last job? This question gives the interviewer the opportunity to learn your strengths. Simply saying: ‘I increased social media engagement’ isn’t going to give your interviewer a sense of what you accomplished. Instead, tell them how you increased social media engagement for the company and why your help was valuable. It’s important to master the a...

Social situations are among the most important in our lives. Yet, there is a huge chance that you are oblivious to the plethora of unwritten social rules that structure everybody’s behaviour. Failing to comply to these cultural imprints can cause irreversible damage. Just following them blindly will not get you ahead. Hacking them, however, will give you the best results possible. Therefore we bring to you these – 25 psychological life hacks that will help you gain the advantage in social situations 1) Assume comfort in any interaction. Our brain is an incredibly complicated instrument. Our relationship with it, is a love-hate one. We think we have control over it but usually something unconscious dictates our actions. In most of our social interactions, we find it difficult to feel comfortable among strangers because our brain tries to protect us from exposure. This however isn’t helping us when trying to be social and meet new people, is it? This is wh...

You’re finally had it with an acquaintance who constantly bugs you. The two of you have never seen eye to eye, and as a result, your blood pressure shoots up even when you think about this person. It’s sad in a way because when you first met, you thought there was a connection. Now, however, the sooner you can eliminate this person from your life, the happier you’ll be. Before you’re able to cut off all communication, someone odd happens. Inadvertently, you’re at the same gathering, seated next to each other in such a way that you can’t just get up and move. The individual turns to you and compliments your new haircut. You start chatting, and realize that maybe this person isn’t so terrible after all. In fact, you totally misjudged the person. Rather than being self-centered and snooty, as you had concluded, the person is a little bit shy and not conceited at all. It’s not long until you’re making plans to renew your acquaintan...

If a person sincerely believes that adultery is wrong but nonetheless feels a very real temptation to cheat, what can he or she do to lessen the chances of crossing that line? There are many lessons which we can borrow from the literature on self-control, weakness of will, and procrastination that may help the perpetually tempted yet well-intentioned person stay faithful to his or her partner. 1. Try harder. This is usually the least satisfying answer, and is also often seen as the least realistic, but I wanted to get it out there so readers can dismiss it if they choose. As I’ve tried to emphasize from time to time since my first post here at Wall Streams, we underestimate our own power to resist temptation through sheer force of will. Of course, our willpower is not limitless, as we know from the work of Roy Baumeister, Kathleen Vohs, and others, and it can easily by exhausted by other mental or physical exertions. Nonetheless it is possible to do in many cases, and as I’...

Fear is the enemy of success. Large rewards only result from taking comparably large risks. If you’re ruled by fear, you’ll never take enough risks and never achieve success you deserve. “If I’ve learned anything in this life, it’s that the actions that scared me the most at the time–leaving a cushy corporate job to freelance, asking my beautiful wife for a first date, and adopting our two kids– have also paid off the most.” That doesn’t mean these moves aren’t hard at the time, but I’ve managed to retrain my brain to get past the momentary fear and push toward the payoff. Here are four ideas that I’ve made an integral part of my thinking: 1. Value Courage Over Security – Repeated surveys have shown that most people value “security” over just about everything else in their lives. People will put up with jobs that they hate, marriages that make them miserable, and habits that are killing them (t...

Soughton HallWedding Photography By Ashton Photography www.ashtonphotography.co.uk Those who don’t marry for love in our culture are considered unlucky, suspect, manipulative, exploitative, and bad. We feel they are either doing something wrong or there is something wrong with them. It makes us feel everything from sympathy to contempt for these folks because most of us were taught that love is the only “right” reason to tie the knot. But if you really think about it, love is a luxury. When you marry for love, it generally means you have all — or at least most — of your other needs met (like food, shelter, warmth, etc). That may explain why those with fewer financial resources also have lower marriage rates: If you’re worried about your survival or safety, you’re not going to be focusing on finding the man or woman of your dreams — unless of course this dream person is your ticket out of your terrible home life, dreary financial pictur...